Back Behind the Wheel!

So if you see a silver Mercedes sedan coming your way, beware! Because Dad might be behind the wheel.

Mom tells me that yesterday afternoon he drove them to the polls and on a variety of errands in the Zebulon area. And today he drove them to Rocky Mount for an appointment. She reports that he's doing an amazing job, and that he might even be a better driver now than he was before. I'd argue that's not saying much! :)

I can't really express how much this step means to me. Dad was always The Driver, and I feel like it was such a big part of who he was, and what it meant for him to be an autonomous, free individual. So this really is great news!

Outpatient Therapy

After this week's therapy sessions, Dad will be discharged from Wake Rehab. They estimate that his recovery is at about 90% -- meaning that he's almost entirely back to where he started! It's just amazing how quickly he's gotten better, and, in fact, how much better he's gotten.

He'll continue to see a physical therapist in Nashville to work on that slow right leg and puny right pointer finger. But sometime in the very near future, he'll start driving again. I think everyone will be glad when that happens!

Montreat

Last week Mom and Dad spent the six days at Chapman House in Montreat along with Aunt Joyce, Aunt Jean, and Uncle George. My cousin Lynn and her husband Mark drove up from Atlanta for a few days as well. Reports are that everyone had a great time. This is the first extended trip Dad has taken since having the stroke.

I'm back in Pine Ridge for another short weekend visit, and Dad is doing very well. He was fitted a few days ago with a C-PAP, which is a breathing device for people who suffer from sleep apnia. It's definitely taking some getting used to. He's had a couple good nights and woken up feeling very rested, and a couple other nights of little sleep and much tossing and turning.

Otherwise things haven't changed much since my last post. Dad's outpatient therapy continues to go well, and he's started seeing a physical therapist/ trainer in Nashville to build his strength. Mom is carrying on, as usual.

Mom and Dad are going back to Asheville for a few days in a couple weeks, and then they're coming out to Rhode Island for a week at Thanksgiving.

Long Farm Weekend

I had Rosh Hashanah off work, and I was able to take one vacation day, so I spent this past weekend with Mom and Dad in Pine Ridge. It was such a treat! We did lots of chores, as usual, but we also took off time and had a few very nice outings. On Saturday night, we went to Zely & Ritz in Raleigh for an early birthday dinner. And then on Sunday, we had brunch at Foster's Market in Chapel Hill and then drove out to Fearrington Village for some shopping.

On Monday, Dad saw his internist and received a glowing report. His bloodwork all came back with good results, and he's lost 7 lbs. since his last visit a month ago. Dr. Helton also commented that Dad was much more alert and engaged than during his last visit. So all is very well.

Much Overdue Update

It's been far too long since my last post. Life has become more complicated for me in the last several weeks; Matt H. and I are both fully immersed in new jobs and finding our way around our new home in Rhode Island. But of course, lots has been happening with Dad.

A few weeks ago, he rejoined the choir at Pine Ridge Baptist. They've already started working on their Christmas music, and Dad greatly enjoys his biweekly sessions with his choir friends. Apparently stroke survivors dealing with aphasia frequently benefit from being involved with music, and so Mom and Dad are thinking of his time with the choir as not just a source of pleasure, but also a form of therapy.

He continues to go to the outpatient rehab center three days a week for speech and occupational therapy, and just this week, he has started seeing a physical therapist in Nashville. While he ended his outpatient physical therapy several weeks ago -- he regained his balance and basic mobility very quickly -- he still needs a little work in the areas of stretching, toning, and enhanced range of joint motion. Anyone who knows Dad will also know that he's not exactly the most flexible person around! His joints, especially his knees, have given him trouble for years -- basically as long as I can remember, he's said he has "bad knees." Meanwhile, he continues to have some weakness in his right index finger. His therapists, though, have said they expect it to return to 99% of its original strength over time.

Whenever Dad thinks about returning to life as usual, and doing things he loves like turning bowls, he's faced with the present reality of a puny right pointer. But at the same time, his attitude throughout this entire experience has been amazing and, without fail, upbeat. And so he seems a bit philosophical about it all -- turning and other sorts of fine motor work will come back eventually. And in the meantime, he'll mow grass. (There's been lots of grass, what with all the rain.) And watch Law and Order.

Last weekend Mom and Dad attended one of their favorite annual church events at Pine Ridge, Homecoming. I was not surprised to hear that Dad indulged in a large wedge of his very favorite Homecoming dessert, Maple Nut Chiffon Cake.

Just today he's had an opportunity to give back a little in the caregiver department and minister to Mom, who had a routine colonoscopy in Raleigh. Thanks to Dominee for shuttling Mom and Dad to and from the hospital!

I'm heading home for a long weekend on Saturday morning; I can't wait to see how things are in Pine Ridge.

Aphasia Day

Yesterday I had an opportunity to attend Dad's weekly group therapy session for aphasia patients. I confess that when I first heard that part of dad's outpatient rehab would involve these weekly gatherings, I was seriously dubious. Dad's just not a group therapy sort of person! I couldn't imagine him participating in a break out session, or a small group exercise, or anything of the sort.

But fortunately, my doubts have turned out to be altogether incorrect. Dad really seems to enjoy spending time with the patients in the group, and has developed an excellent rapport with the group leader, a very dynamic and charasmatic speech therapist named Maura Silverman. Most of the patients deal with much more serious impediments than Dad faces. Most -- but not all -- of the patients have suffered strokes, but all have had some sort of brain injury. Some of them struggle with apraxia (another speech function disorder) in addition to aphasia, others have significant physical challenges, and still others are working to recover everyday functions such as recognizing numbers and letters. And yet despite their many differences, they all seem to genuinely enjoy being in a community of shared goals. I witnessed much laughter, many smiles, and a great deal of mutual affection.

Spending a little time with the group helped me understand just how well Dad is doing, and how amazing it is that he's progressed so far in such a short period of time. Likewise, Dad also seems to have gained an important sense of perspective. About midway through the group session yesterday, he came over to where I was sitting and took a little break. He was more reflective than I once would have imagined possible, and I was so pleased and encouraged to hear his comments about this experience. "These are all good people," he said, "and being with them makes me so thankful to be in the condition I'm in." We talked about the different ways the group members had sustained their injuries -- one young member was invovled in a terrible cycling accident, another member has just recently had a portion of her skull replaced after surviving numerous complications that required her to wear a helmet for several months. And Dad also made an important point: lots of people who suffer brain damage don't make it at all. He seems to be truly grateful to be alive, and that perspective seems to have made a tremendous difference to his outlook.

Next week Mom and Dad are flying back to Rhode Island with me to visit for a few days. Who would have thought 10 weeks ago that he'd be able to make such a long trip? I'm constantly amazed by the speed of his recovery; he's such a strong, resilient person.

And on the 31st of this month, Mom and Dad will celebrate their 45th anniversary. What a wonderful gift to have had all these years together -- and to be able to look ahead to many more to come.

Belated Update

Lots has happened since the last time I posted. Dad's recovery continues at a rapid pace. He has completed the physical therapy portion of rehab, which consists primarily of working to build balance and mobility functions. This is not to say, however, that Dad's completely back to his pre-stroke condition. A bit of weakness in his right leg remains, and he still has a ways to go with recovering his full right hand fine-motor skills. Of course, these are minor impediments that will likely be corrected with time, and it's amazing that he's come so far in just over 10 weeks.

Dad's physical recovery has been so swift, in fact, that he's returned to working in the garden and around the farm, especially on Saturday morning--always the big chore time--when he has help from Lee. Of course, Dad's undaunted approach to work has been essential for returning to this sort of demanding physical activity. Even when faced with a challenge, he just charges ahead and works through it.

Earlier this week he decided it was time to get back to additional everyday activities, namely using his computer. It seems that some of his computing skills disappeared with the stroke, and so he and Mom have arranged to begin weekly private instructional sessions at the Apple store in Raleigh. Apparently the in-store training staff has training in working with stroke survivors, and so Dad and Mom are both very excited to get going with this new adventure.

Another everyday skill he hopes to recover soon is driving. His therapists at the rehab center will begin working towards this goal soon; they have a battery of tests, as well as in-the-center driving exercises, to determine when he's road-ready. Any of you who know Dad will surely appreciate how difficult it's been for him to be only a passenger for this long!

Meanwhile, Mom and Dad have just enjoyed a very long visit from Matt, Elizabeth, Lucy, and Simon, who were able to spend two weeks in Pine Ridge. Matt and Elizabeth provided much help and support around the house and farm, and Mom tells me that Lucy and Simon kept Dad company and made him smile. What better therapy can a grandfather get?

Mom is doing really well. Of course, she has gained tremendous strength and support from all the family members who live close by, and from the wonderful community at Pine Ridge Baptist, and from all her dear friends from Rocky Mount and elsewhere. She's also done some reading that has been very helpful, both in terms of encouraging her through difficult moments, and by helping her understand the nuts and bolts -- medical, physiological, psychological, etc. -- of what happens during a stroke. Two books in particular are Jill Bolte Taylor's My Stroke of Insight and Norman Doidge's The Brain that Changes Itself.

Thanks to all of you who have visited Dad recently. He really seems to thrive on this sort of contact, and any opportunity he can have to engage in conversation, initiate discussion, and just make chit-chat with friends is incredibly helpful.

Progress Report

Yesterday Dad, Mom, and I met with all of Dad's therapists -- speech, physical, and two occupational -- plus the social worker who is coordinating his rehabilitation.  He had just completed his third week in rehab and was due for a progress report.  We were thrilled with the news we got.  

Not surprisingly, his physical recovery is almost perfect:  he tested at 4.5 out of 5 for mobility and balance.  Bette, his PT, is continuing to work on his flexibility as well as fine motor skills in his right hand.  

The area that continues to challenge Dad the most is definitely speech; we are learning, more and more, that "speech therapy" encompasses a tremendously broad area of cognition.  In fact, it's kind of hard to figure out where Occupational Therapy leaves off and Speech Therapy picks up.  For example, sequencing -- or completing the steps for a task in the proper order -- is a speech-based challenge.  Anyway, lately Dad's speech therapist, Kelly, has also started to work more on his reading activities, especially the various levels of comprehension and recall.  

We were especially excited, though, when Kelly told us how much he has improved in the last 3 weeks.  During his first visit, Dad tested about 20% on the battery of tests she administered.  This week, he tested at 75%.  Still some room for improvement, to be sure, but how exciting!

Anecdotally, I've noticed a tremendous improvement in Dad's conversational skills since I last saw him just under 2 weeks ago.  His vocabulary is strong -- yesterday he referred to something as "assinine."  Good one, Jackie.

The folks at the rehab center predict that Dad's outpatient therapy will last 16 weeks altogether -- 13 weeks longer -- at which point they expect that he will be able to function with close to full independence.  This is not to say, of course, that his recovery will cease at that point.  Most stroke patients report change, growth, and improvement one, two, even three years or longer after their strokes.  For now, we're hoping for a continued upward path and steady, regular progress.

Adventures with the Aunts

Yesterday afternoon my Aunt Jean and Uncle George arrived from Tampa; they'll be staying in Pine Ridge for about 10 days. How wonderful of them to come to NC!

Dad had today off from therapy, so this morning, Mom and Dad went to Raleigh with Aunt Jean and Aunt Joyce to see an exhibit of the Dead Sea Scrolls at the North Carolina Museum of Natural Sciences. Afterwards they got takeout from P.F. Changs -- everyone's favorite.

I'm so pleased that Dad's able to make these outings now. He really seems to benefit from being out and about. In fact, he got a little cranky on his day off last week when Mom didn't have anything planned!

Farm and Other Activities

I returned to Pine Ridge on Friday to find Dad in good spirits.  He and Mom had a very busy week, with therapy each day Monday through Thursday.  On Wednesday, they attended their first weekly meeting of TAP (Triangle Aphasia Project), a group that helps patients with aphasia re-engage.  It also offers support to families of the patients.

During the week Dad revisited a couple of his favorite activities:  gardening and puttering around the farm on the Ranger, their all-wheel farm vehicle.  Yesterday the usual Saturday yard chores took up most of the morning, and Dad was able to help me remember how to pilot his crazy Husqvarna zero-turn mower without careening around like a drunk driver.  He also rode herd on everyone, including Lee and Andre, walking around and pointing out spots of grass we might have missed.

Visits from friends and family continue to sustain us all, and of course we are so grateful for the help that everyone is providing.  Mom's cousins Doris and Betty have done an amazing job keeping the garden watered and weeded.  On Thursday night Dad's office staff brought dinner, and Mom reports that everyone had a grand time.

Aunt Jean and Uncle George are arriving from Tampa on Monday afternoon and will stay for two weeks.  Everyone's looking forward to their visit.

This morning Mom is conducting a biscuit-making tutorial for me; it's one of those essential Southern skills I've never have gotten the hang of.  And later on we're going to head out to the Raleigh Farmers Market to buy provisions for our summer veg dinner.  Matt, who had to stay in Princeton working on the last- minute details of his book manuscript this weekend, will no doubt be jealous; the veg dinner with cornbread is one of his favorite Pine Ridge summer rituals.

Big Ed's

Dad is settling in nicely to his routine at home.  He seems very pleased to be able to spend time in his armchair watching his big TV, and TNT has obliged with plenty Law and Order episodes for his viewing pleasure!

On Tuesday of this week Dad began his out-patient therapy schedule in Raleigh with 4 hours of sessions with his OT, PT, and speech therapist.  He had more sessions on Wednesday, and is taking a break today.  Sessions resume tomorrow, and from now on, he'll go for 3 weekly sessions of 3 hours apiece.  He'll also attend one weekly group session for patients dealing with aphasia.

Matt H. and I arrived in Pine Ridge last night to find Mom, Dad, and Eli waiting for us on the front porch.  Dad is in very good spirits and continuing his road to recovery.  We'll be here for the long holiday weekend and are looking forward to spending lots of quality time with both Mom and Dad. Oh--and Eli too, of course.

This morning we piled in the car and drove to Raleigh for breakfast at Big Ed's in City Market, one of Dad's favorite places.  Matt's midwestern culinary sensibilities were piqued by menu items including brains and eggs, roe and eggs, fatback, red eye gravy, and blackstrap molasses for your biscuits.  He elected for the more predictable choice of french toast.

Home

This morning we loaded up Dad and all his stuff and made the short trip from Raleigh to Pine Ridge.  Eli welcomed us all, but especially Dad, who was very glad to see his dear old dog.  We had a quiet day, with naps for everyone.  Late in the afternoon we all headed down to the barn to take care of the animals.  Mom recruited Matt M. to do some repairs on the chicken coop, and in the meantime, she and Dad herded a wayward flock of young chickens.   Tonight we all shared dinner together at the kitchen table -- a vast improvement over eating in a hospital room!

Let's Roll

According to Jackie's therapy team, he is ready to return to our home; it's been a long three weeks and three days.  He is medically stable,  has completed the necessay inpatient assessment, and is ready to transition to day therapy three hours a day, three days a week.  Matt Mullen and Sarah Katharyn are here to help with the homegoing. I have to tell you, nothing brings a smile and a glow to this man's face more than to see his children appear at his bedside.  And, I am so grateful to have their help.

Busy Day

Long, sound naps followed Jackie's therapy sessions today. This is hard work. Of course, this man, as you all know, thrives on hard work. And he loves nothing more than a good, stiff challenge. At this stage, there are many challenges on the road to recovery -- but in usual fashion, he's going after them "like killing snakes." And his progress reflects it; he's walking unassisted and it's becoming more and more evident everyday that he's successfully picking up and reorganizing those vocabulary files that were scattered by the stroke.

I continue to be overwhelmed by the kindness and generosity all of you are showing us. It sustains me and gives me the strength and the courage to carry on with faith and hope.

Holding Down the Fort

Meanwhile, our family in Rocky Mount and Pine Ridge has sprung into action and done an amazing job caring for the house, the gardens, and the animals.  We so appreciate everyone's help.  Knowing that all is well has definitely put Mom's mind at ease, and made her feel OK about staying put at the hospital.  The same is true of Paul Gaskins and the office staff, who are doing a great job with the practice.  Thank you thank you thank you to you all.

Thanks to Betsy

We wanted to post a special note of thanks to Betsy Gaskins-McClaine, who has shown us tremendous kindness and generosity during our 6 days here at Wake Med.  She's made sure Dad receives the best possible care, she was instrumental in getting him into a private room in rehab, and she has shepherded Mom through the most difficult moments.  Thank you, Betsy.  We are very grateful.

June 20, 2008

Mom and Dad are settling into their rehab routine nicely.  Mom has set up shop in Dad's room and plans to stay with him as long as he's here.  The room has a large recliner that folds out into a relatively comfortable bed, and last night she and Dad were able to sleep soundly side by side.

Today Dad had a busy morning schedule and a quiet afternoon.  Weekends are a little different than weekdays; the therapy sessions are less rigorous, and Dad had a free afternoon.  Lots of friends visited--thanks to all of you for spending some time with us this afternoon.

On the Lam

For those of you who might be wondering if Dad's personality has been affected by the stroke, you'll be pleased to know that the staff in the rehab center has written the word "impulsive" on his wall chart, complete with an asterisk by the word for extra emphasis.

And early this morning, Dad made a break for freedom.  The staff found him at the end of the hall by the elevators, preparing to exit the building.  

While the rehab staff is surely frustrated, we are all pleased to see the Jackie we know and love shining through.  Needless to say, this isn't just an indication of his naughty personality.  It also means that his ability to walk without assistance has improved dramatically.  Mom reports that his right leg is very strong, and his gait is almost back to normal.

This morning, he is having his first full set of therapy sessions, along with an appointment with a neuropsychologist.  This afternoon, he'll be transferred into a private room, and he'll wear a monitoring bracelet that sets off an alarm if he leaves the room.  This should preclude any more ill-conceived attempts to go on the lam.

Another Step

June 19, 2008

Jackie's move to the WakeMed Rehab Hospital will happen this afternoon. We're told the average stay is two weeks. Of course, Jackie's odds-beating track record could mean a shorter-than- average stay. I certainly wouldn't be surprised. What a life! Forty five years in August.  I might even describe it as a roller coaster ride - fast and furious, up and down, round and round, fun and exciting, and scary!  But, I'm a better person because of it. Thanks Jackie.

Real Clothes

June 18, 2008

Seeing Jackie in his typical farm duds today is really exciting. And to top it off, he is wearing his favorite orange, UT, baseball cap. He was even mistaken by a nurse as a visitor on one of his trips down the hall.  His physicians have recommended continued therapy as an inpatient at the WakeMed Rehab Hospital and today he was accepted; we're waiting for a bed.  

Your prayers, cards, emails, and calls have been wonderful, and I believe, a huge factor in his dramatic progress. Keep it up.

Judy

June 18, 2008

I flew back to Princeton early yesterday morning, so my last visit with Dad was on Monday night. But Mom reports that he spent most of the day out of bed working with his various therapists, and even taking a short walk (with the help of a walker) outside of his room and down the hallway. That's amazing, really, considering that he didn't leave the bed at all for more than a week while in Florida. His occupational therapist predicts he'll be able to walk unassisted in a few days.

Mom also reports that Dad really enjoyed his visits from Shelia, Jane, Deborah, and Travis. Thanks to you all! And huge thanks to Dominee, who took time out of her crazy schedule to sit with Dad yesterday morning. Mom was able to make her first trip back to Pine Ridge to check the mail, collect some different clothes, etc. We're so grateful for all the help we've had from friends and family.

June 17, 2008--a few words of clarification

This morning it occurred to me that the glowing reports I've been posting of Dad's improvement might be somewhat misleading, and that visitors might be surprised to find him in a seriously compromised state. Let me be clear: he suffered an acute stroke, and currently, he is simply not the same person who left Pine Ridge for Disney World almost two weeks ago.

While his right side is growing stronger every day, his motor skills in his right hand are somewhat lacking, and he can only take tentative, shuffling steps. Likewise, while he can speak clearly, he often says things that don't make much sense. He might not be able to answer questions, and he often isn't able to respond to requests or commands. He recognizes me and my mom, but he might not recognize others. He often appears confused, and he doesn't seem to have much awareness about what has happened to him or where he is.

And so while we have been enormously encouraged by his remarkable progress, I thought it'd be a good idea to put everything in context. Just over a week ago, my Dad could not speak, he could not move his right side, and he did not know who we were.

Today, he's walking a bit, he knows who he is, where he lives, and what he does for a living. He can brush his teeth and comb his hair, he can feed himself and swallow solids. He's also able to carry on short conversations and interacts very appropriately with the doctors, nurses, and therapists who visit him. And we see signs of his funny, mischievous personality all the time.

Relatively speaking, then, he has made tremendous strides towards recovery. Just this morning, his Occupational Therapist commented that his strength, mobility, and cognition have drastically improved since their session yesterday.

Meanwhile, we are preparing for him to be moved--most likely tomorrow--to the Rehab Hospital at Wake Med. If you'd like to visit, please be sure to call my mom's cell phone beforehand; there's no telling where we'll be!

June 16, 2008--later in the evening

So much happened today. Dad met with a speech therapist, a physical therapist, and an occupational therapist. He spent much of the day out of the bed--this is a meaningful improvement--and even showed a little of his old headstrong self at one point by trying to force his way past Mom and out of the room. Fortunately, my uncles Charles and Craig were nearby to help restrain the old bear.

Thanks to family for visting this evening, and also to Mary Ellison and Lyn Turner. And many thanks as well to Tommy and Kelli who made an incredibly generous number of trips to and fro various points in Raleigh for us.

June 16, 2008

Always the tough competitor, Dad continues to beat the odds and is doing amazingly well. This morning he passed a swallow study with flying colors, and so for lunch he had his first solid food--spaghetti and meatballs, to be precise. He's also been feeding himself using his right hand, sitting independently, standing a bit, and taking a few tentative steps from bed to recliner. We are amazed by his progress.

The staff at Wake Med is taking excellent care of him, and Mom is doing well too. She is currently staying in a deluxe suite in the Heart Center Inn (thank you, Betsy McClain!), which is in the same wing of the hospital as Dad's room.

I'm heading back to Princeton this evening for a few days at work; I'll be back in Raleigh this weekend. I can't wait to see all that happens while I'm gone!

June 15, 2008

We have arrived at Wake Med, and all is well. 2 parts of the transport experience went extremely well: the ambulance from the hospital in Orlando was quick and simple, and the flight couldn't have been better. (Mom and I have decided that we'd prefer to fly in a private jet from now on!)

Unfortunately, the ambulance that met us at RDU was staffed with two of the most incompetent people possible -- neither of them knew how to get from the airport to the hospital. Needless to say, that added to Mom's anxiety level somewhat.

Fortunately, we got here despite the difficulties, and Dad is resting peacefully in his room. We are grateful for his (and our) safe arrival. Mom is happy and relieved to be back home.

June 14, 2008

Progress continues today. Dad has been funny and alert, and has spent much of the day glued to various sporting contests--the US Open, a Spain vs. Sweden soccer match, and an Indy car race (I'm not sure which one). He has been very peaceful, taking short naps throughout the day.

We have finalized plans to leave Orlando tomorrow morning via American Aerovac, the ambulance jet service. Dad will be admitted to telemetry at Wake Med, and then, we hope, into rehab later in the coming week.

June 13, 2008

Today marks Day 6 here at Dr. Phillips Hospital in Orlando.  Dad was rushed to the emergency room last Saturday morning, having suffered an acute stroke just as he was getting ready to finish up the last session of the Spears Conference he had attended at Disney World.

This week has brought many challenges, needless to say, but also many rewards and much progress.  When Dad arrived at the hospital almost a week ago, he was almost entirely paralyzed on his right side, and he had lost his speech altogether.  Tonight, he is alert, talking, and able to move his right side with ever-increasing strength and ease.  We don't always know what he's saying, but it's clear that Jackie is present; his smiles and sense of humor come through with increasing frequency.  And he's often able to answer questions with entirely lucid responses, which makes us all very hopeful for a full recovery of his considerable cognitive abilities.

Today he also passed another essential landmark:  he was able to take his first food by mouth.

Meanwhile, Mom is carrying on through this very difficult time with incredible strength and tenacity.  In typical Judy fashion, she is riding herd on the hospital staff, advocating for Dad at every moment and making sure that he receives the best care possible.

We hope to be able to transport Dad to Wake Med in Raleigh on Sunday.  The plans are for Dad to travel by a Lear jet air ambulance service, which has room for two passengers, so Mom and I will be able to fly with him.  It's a short flight--about 75 minutes--and the service includes transportation from hospital bed to hospital bed.

We are very grateful for everyone who has visited here at the hospital--thanks to Uncle George, Andrea, Dolores, and Sandy, and especially to Aunt Jean, who spent two nights with Mom this week when I returned to work in Princeton.   More than anyone else, though, we have relied on Matt H. for his wise counsel, for his sense of humor, and for being the Voice of Reason during the most difficult moments.  And of course we are also thankful to everyone who has called and emailed, and offered their kind words and prayers.